Children are a Special Kind of Stress

I heard on the news Monday morning married couples who have no kids are happier than married couples with children.  My answer to this study... no kidding!  It doesn't take a genius or scientists who have nothing better to do than perform a study that is a no brainer to know the answer to the question they posed.

Let me tell you why.

Kids are stressful.  Any kind of stress put on a marriage makes a marriage harder which can eventually lead to not being as happy as possible.  Take away the stressful situation, and voila!  People can be happier.

Children are a special kind of stress.  A stress lasting years and never quite goes away.

Doesn't matter if you have one or a dozen.  Granted, one is easier to manage than say 6, but every child causes stress on a parent.  It starts from day one with decisions such as breast or formula fed.  Organic or non-organic.  Cloth or disposable diapers.  Someone always has an opinion on what you should do and how you should raise your kids.  That's a lot of pressure especially for first time parents.

Fast forward, now you have a walking toddler.  How far should a parent baby proof the house?  What age is the right age for potty training?  Potty training is a living hell all parents have to go through that deserves its own section of stressfulness.  I will forego that today.

Couples with no children are capable of running simple errands without it becoming some epic Lord of the Rings journey. I don't even remember what it's like to go to the grocery store alone.  That magical place with all kinds of food and temptation for your little ones saying, "Can we get this?"  And you saying, "No put it back" and praying that is the end of the conversation.  To be able to run in and get milk without having to load up the kids, unload them, get a cart, get everyone situated in said cart, walk to the back far corner of the store (because heaven forbid you don't have to walk the entire length to get the only thing you need), keep said children with you at all times, grab the milk, go back the entire length of the store to check out, keep said children with you at all times again, checkout, walk to your car to load the kids back up, return the cart, and head home.  That is what happens when you have kids.  And yes, it is stressful.

Couples without kids do not have to worry about someone waking them up at all hours of the night with sicknesses, growing pains, teething, nightmares, night terrors (yes, there is a big difference), or just the fact your child decided to be wide awake at 4am.  Couples without children get a full night's sleep.  I'm not even sure what that is anymore.  I've been sleep deprived for years!

Couples without kids do not have not worry about scheduling or picking up child #1 while taking child #2 over to whatever activity they are participating in.  Scheduling is wide open with no children.  No childreners can actually go out on dates at the spur of the moment and go to fancy restaurants.  Those were the days (nostalgic sigh).

Eating meals without having to tell a little person to sit their butt down in the chair and put food in their mouth would be heavenly.

Having kids is stressful on married couples.  I can this without a study showing me.

But you know what.  As stressful as my life is having kids in it, my marriage is still going strong.  I'm crazy happy with my husband.  With all the negatives having kids can bring, they also bring a tremendous amount of joy to us.

Seeing them grow up amazes me everyday.  Watching their personalities develop over time is something no one else can give you.

I ask Andrew at least once a week if there is a return policy on our kids.  He just shakes his head at me and says, "No, but I wish sometimes."  It takes a lot of work and sacrifice to raise little ones, but in my eyes, it's worth it.

For all the married couples without children, enjoy what that freedom gives you.  Be happier than me according to this study.  Live your lives being able to run the grocery store for 1 item, and it not be an adventure.  I applaud you for your freedom mainly because there are a lot of days I wish I had it!

As for me, I'll continue with the craziness that is my life of having three little ones and one on the way.  I'll continue my epic journeys to the grocery store.  I will be stressed out and give up my freedom.  It's my choice, and I don't regret it for one minute.