According to today's standards, I should be dead.

According to today's parenting standards, I should be traumatized, have an irrational fear of discipline, have 'mommy' and 'daddy' issues, and/or be dead.

Yet... here I am!

I'm alive.  I'm quite healthy.  I'm an accomplished adult with a college degree and two Masters degrees under my belt.  I contribute to society.  I'm grateful for the things I have.  I give back to society by donating clothes, food, and volunteering (when I actually have the time).  I'm completely boring and normal.

There is so much pressure on parents today to live up to these ridiculous standards set by ourselves, society, and other parents.  Who has the time to throw a Pinterest approved party for their one year old?  Not me.  She got a cupcake, Happy Birthday sung to her, and opened 4 gifts from family members.  There was no cake smash, party strings, or hats.  I stuck a bow on her from a gift.  Does that count as decoration?  And all of this ok.

My kids play outside on our driveway or at a park when I have energy and foresight to take them.  They dig in the dirt, swing, ride bikes, play good guy v bad guy, and generally run around like fools.  But that's ok!  They're having fun!  They're building memories.  No reason to run around trying to find activities and ideas for crafts for them everyday.  We'll do something on special occasions (aka a holiday or if I get randomly inspired which is rare), but it is not my job to entertain my kids all the time.  That's why I had 4!  They have built in playmates called siblings.

I severely limit electronics and TV watching in our house.  They watch morning cartoons, but those get turned off at 8am every day.  We'll watch movies, but the television isn't on all the time.  My kids aren't allowed to play on the computer at all.  I'll let Jackson do some stuff for school on it every now and then, but that's it.  No playing on tablets, Kindles, cell phones, or any other devices.  The only time we've ever used that technique is in doctor's offices or road trips, and that's called survival.  I believe in letting them create, build, and use their imagination.  Not become a drone to electronics and TV.

My Granny locked my cousin, brother, and I outside the entire afternoon in the middle of the summer in Florida one day.  We were being too loud, and she couldn't hear her stories.  Then she proceeded to fall asleep and forgot about us.  We played, drank from the hose outside, and were finally let back in the house when my Aunt arrived home.  I'm still kickin' it.

My brother and I were constantly kicked out of the house to go play as kids.  We ran around the neighbor on our bikes, played with the neighborhood kids, went to the playground, and generally were hooligans.  But our butts were back home by nightfall every night.  We even rolled around in a garbage can one afternoon just for fun.  We're both still around.

I fell out of the window of a one story house while a hurricane was going on outside.  Still here.

My kids have eaten dirt.  They jump off of furniture (even though it is banned in our house).  They play boxing or 'fight' (which I should probably ban but some things just aren't worth fighting).  They make toy guns.  They climb trees, run around, and dig holes in our backyard most days.

Just last night, Jackson was at soccer practice when he and his teammate were both going after the ball.  He got kicked in the knee so hard, myself and the other parents heard it.  I didn't get up and run over there as soon as it happened.  I just sat there seeing if he could work it out himself.  I finally got up about 30 seconds later when he started grabbing his knee and crying.  The crying was so delayed I knew he was fine.  I checked his knee, told him he was fine, and helped him up.  He got a drink of water, then ran back onto the field to play.  I didn't coddle him.  I didn't make the other kid feel bad.  It was an accident, and shit happens.  No biggie.  He survived and has a nice bruise to prove it.

It's not my job to be my kid's play toy, coddle them, or be their best friend.  It's my job to parent them as I see fit.  I'm not going to fall into this Pinterest society of everything having to be perfect or creating those 'special memories' every day by constantly enabling them to rely on me.  My kids will learn to stand on their own two feet.  They will learn to solve their own problems, and I will intervene when necessary just like my parents did.

I'm not saying my parenting style is perfect or the only one.  Nope.  It's just mine.  I was raised this way, and I survived with no trauma.

What I am saying is, we, as parents, need to not feel this ridiculous pressure to make every moment special.  We need to let our kids' imaginations run free.  We should not be afraid to let our kids fail and learn a lesson.  We need to encourage each other and accept that we may not all be following the same path, but everyone's end goal is the same:

Raising good kids who will contribute to society and make a difference.